I am so lost. I don’t understand how one can live without a passion in life, a goal. I have no passion, no goals, and so far I haven’t been faring well. Nothing makes me happy but the thought of the things I don’t have and because I don’t have them, I am unhappy. I will forever be searching.
I don’t feel alone until I’m in a room full of people.
Poems amount to so little when you write them too early in your life. You ought to wait and gather sense and sweetness for a whole lifetime, and a lone one if possible, and then, at the very end, you might perhaps be able to write ten good lines. For poems are not, as people think, simply emotions (one has emotions early enough)—they are experiences.
For the sake of a single peom, you must see many cities, many people and Things, you must understand animals, must feel how birds fly, and know the gesture which small flowers make when they open in the morning. You must be able to think back to streets in unknown neighborhoods, to unexpected encounters, and to partings you had long seen coming; to days of childhood whose mystery is still unexplained, to parents whom you had to hurt when they brought in a joy and you didn’t pick it up (it was a joy meant for somebody else—); to childhood illnesses that began so strangely with so many profound and difficult transformations, to days in quiet, restrained rooms and to mornings by the sea, to the sea itself, to seas, to nights of travel that rushed along high overhead and went flying with all the stars, and it is still not enough to be able to think of all that.
You must have memories of many nights of love, each one different from all the others, memories of women screaming in labor, and of light, pale, sleeping girls who have just given birth and are closing again. But you must also have been beside the dying, must have sat beside the dead in the room with the open window and the scattered noises. And it is not yet enough to have memories. You must be able to forget them when they are many, and you must have the immense patience to wait until they return. For the memories themselves are not important. Only when they have changed into our very blood, into glance and gesture, and are nameless, no longer to be distinguished from ourselves—only then can it happen that in some very rare hour the first word of a poem arises in their midst and goes forth from them.
Rainer Maria Rilke, from The Notebooks of Malte Laurids Brigge inThe Selected Poetry of Rainer Maria Rilke, edited and translated by Stephen Mitchell (Vintage International, 1989)

Robert Remsen Vickrey is an artist who specializes in the medium of egg tempera. My art teacher today had shown me a huge book about the process he takes in creating such life-like pieces of work. In class I had been working on drawing and sketching bicycles and I must say much inspiration has come from images such as this. For more examples of this artwork, please visit the website. I find these paintings slightly eery, yet moving. They allow your imagination to fill the story its trying to tell.
My dad is working on a local news site with four or five other men and they are ready to make millions a year.
They haven’t even opened yet. :(
But I still have hope for him. Please wish it luck :)
In actuality I have no desire to write. I favor much more to sit and watch movies or eat junk food and complain how many calories I consumed, or rather watch movies and eat junk all the while complaining about the excessive calories digested in a mere can of soda, than waste my time and effort writing pointless ideas down on paper. I have no intentions to indite my mind for I’ve misplaced it earlier back. However, the odd thing being I am, yes, at this very point in time, writing with no extreme purpose. Truth be told, I write extensively. I even have a journal where I write my points of view on the day along with every mind boggling controversy the world faces. My friends call it weird, but I call it expressive.